SCENE III. The same. A room in the palace.

Enter the Lord Chamberlain and Lord SANDS.
Cham. Is't possible the spells of France should juggle
Men into such strange mysteries?

Sands.

Though they be never so ridiculous,

New customs,

Nay, let 'em be unmanly, yet are follow'd.

Cham. As far as I see, all the good our English
Have got by the late voyage is but merely

A fit or two o' the face; but they are shrewd ones;
For when they hold 'em, you would swear directly
Their very noses had been counsellors

To Pepin or Clotharius, they keep state so.

Sands. They've all new legs, and lame ones: one would take it,

That never saw 'em pace before, the spavin

Or springhalt reign'd among 'em.(37)

Cham.

Death! my lord,

Their clothes are after such a pagan cut too,(38)
That, sure, they've worn out Christendom.

Enter Sir THOMAS LOVELL.

What news, Sir Thomas Lovell?

Lov.

How now!

Faith, my lord,

I hear of none, but the new proclamation

That's clapp'd upon the court-gate.

Cham.

What is't for?

Lov. The reformation of our travell'd gallants,

That fill the court with quarrels, talk, and tailors.

Cham. I'm glad 'tis there: now I would pray our mon

sieurs

To think an English courtier may be wise,

And never see the Louvre.

Lov.

They must either—

For so run the conditions-leave those remnants
Of fool and feather, that they got in France,
With all their honourable points of ignorance

Pertaining thereunto,-as fights and fireworks;
Abusing better men than they can be,

Out of a foreign wisdom,-renouncing clean
The faith they have in tennis, and tall stockings,
Short blister'd breeches, and those types of travel,
And understand again like honest men;

Or pack to their old playfellows: there, I take it,
They may, cum privilegio, wear(39) away
The lag end of their lewdness, and be laugh'd at.

Sands. 'Tis time to give 'em physic, their diseases
Are grown so catching.

Cham.

What a loss our ladies

Will have of these trim vanities!

Lov.

Ay, marry,

There will be woe indeed, lords: the sly whoresons

Have got a speeding trick to lay down ladies;

A French song and a fiddle has no fellow.

Sands. The devil fiddle 'em! I'm glad they're going;

For, sure, there's no converting of 'em: now

An honest country lord, as I am, beaten

A long time out of play, may bring his plain-song,
And have an hour of hearing; and, by'r lady,
Held(40) current music too.

This night he makes a supper, and a great one,

To many lords and ladies; there will be

The beauty of this kingdom, I'll assure you.

Lov. That churchman bears a bounteous mind indeed,

A hand as fruitful as the land that feeds us;

His dews fall every where.

Cham.

No doubt he's noble;

He had a black mouth that said other of him.

Sands. He may, my lord,-'has wherewithal; in him Sparing would show a worse sin than ill doctrine:

Men of his way should be most liberal;

They're set here for examples. (41)

Cham.

True, they are so ;

But few now give so great ones. My barge stays;
Your lordship shall along.-Come, good Sir Thomas,
We shall be late else; which I would not be,
For I was spoke to, with Sir Henry Guildford,
This night to be comptrollers.

Sands.

I'm your lordship's. [Exeunt.

SCENE IV. The same. The presence-chamber in York-Place.

Hautboys. A small table under a state for the Cardinal, a longer table for the guests. Enter, on one side, ANNE BULLEN and divers Lords, Ladies, and Gentlewomen, as guests; on the other, enter Sir HENRY GUILDFORD.

Guild. Ladies, a general welcome from his grace

Salutes ye all; this night he dedicates

To fair content and you: none here, he hopes,

In all this noble bevy, has brought with her
One care abroad; he would have all as merry

As far as good company, good wine, good welcome,(42)
Can make good people.—O, my lord, you're tardy:

Enter Lord Chamberlain, Lord SANDS, and Sir THOMAS LOVELL. The very thought of this fair company

Clapp'd wings to me.

Cham.

You're young, Sir Harry Guildford. Sands. Sir Thomas Lovell, had the cardinal But half my lay thoughts in him, some of these Should find a running banquet ere they rested, I think would better please 'em: by my life, They are a sweet society of fair ones.

Lov. O, that your lordship were but now confessor To one or two of these!

They should find easy penance.

Lov.

Faith, how easy?

Sands. As easy as a down-bed would afford it. Cham. Sweet ladies, will it please you sit?-Sir Harry, Place you that side; I'll take the charge of this: His grace is entering.-Nay, you must not freeze; Two women plac'd together makes cold weather:My Lord Sands, you are one will keep 'em waking; Pray, sit between these ladies.

By my faith,

Sands. And thank your lordship.-By your leave, sweet ladies : [Seats himself between Anne Bullen and another Lady.

If I chance to talk a little wild, forgive me;

I had it from my father.

Anne.

Was he mad, sir?

Sands. O, very mad, exceeding mad, in love too: But he would bite none; just as I do now,

He would kiss you twenty with a breath.

Cham.

[Kisses her.

Well said, my lord.—

So, now you're fairly seated.-Gentlemen,
The penance lies on you, if these fair ladies
Pass away, frowning.

Sands.

Let me alone.

For my little cure,

Hautboys. Enter Cardinal WOLSEY, attended, and takes his state.

Wol. Ye're welcome, my fair guests: that noble lady,

Or gentleman, that is not freely merry,

Is not my friend: this, to confirm my welcome;

And to you all, good health.

Sands.

[Drinks.

Let me have such a bowl may hold my thanks,

And save me so much talking.

Wol.

My Lord Sands,

I am beholding to you: cheer your neighbours.

Ladies, you are not merry :-gentlemen,

Whose fault is this?

Sands.

The red wine first must rise

In their fair cheeks, my lord; then we shall have 'em

Talk us to silence.

Anne.

My Lord Sands.

Sands.

You're a merry gamester,

Yes, if I make(43) my play.

Here's to your ladyship: and pledge it, madam,
For 'tis to such a thing,—

Anne.

You cannot show me.

Sands. I told your grace they would talk anon.

Wol.

[Drum and trumpets, and chambers discharged, within.

Cham. Look out there, some of ye.

Wol

What's that?

[Exit a Servant. What warlike voice,

And to what end, is this ?-Nay, ladies, fear not ;
By all the laws of war ye're privileg'd.

Cham. How now! what is't?

Serv.

Re-enter Servant.

A noble troop of strangers,

For so they scem: they've left their barge, and landed ;
And hither make, as great ambassadors

From foreign princes.

Wol.

Good lord chamberlain,

Go, give 'em welcome; you can speak the French tongue;
And, pray, receive 'em nobly, and conduct 'em
Into our presence, where this heaven of beauty

Shall shine at full upon them.-Some attend him.

[Exit Chamberlain, attended. All rise, and the
tables are removed.

You've now a broken banquet; but we'll mend it.
A good digestion to you all: and once more

I shower a welcome on ye;-welcome all.

Hautboys. Enter the King and others, as masquers, habited like shepherds, ushered by the Lord Chamberlain. They pass directly before the Cardinal, and gracefully salute him.

A noble company! what are their pleasures?

Cham. Because they speak no English, thus they pray'd

me(44)

To tell your grace,-that, having heard by fame.
Of this so noble and so fair assembly

This night to meet here, they could do no less,