Nothing Doing

MISTRESS Jane, I saw the milkman kiss you this morning. In the future I will take the milk in.

JANE 'Twouldn't be no use, mum. He's promised never to kiss anybody but me.Illustrated Bits.

What Would the Letter Be?

A MR. SMITH, of Worcester, stuttered so that it was painful to hear him try to speak. One day his lawyer in Boston, wrote, asking him to send a letter stating certain facts about a case soon to be tried. The next noon he appeared at the office and said, "I th-th-thought I'd c-c-c-come down m-m-m-myself, as talk b-b-b-b-better'n I

C-c-c-c-can
write."-Boston Herald.

EXPERIENCE may be a school

To which we all must go; But no one likes its college yell Of plain "I told you so!"

Carnivorous

"YES," said the thin man, munching his apple, "I'm a strict vegetarian.'

"You mean you think you are," replied the observant

man.

"What do you mean by that?"

"I mean that I noticed a worm in that bit of apple you just swallowed."

I

c-c-can

The Minister's Announcement

A GENTLEMAN in Durban made a present of a beautiful baptismal font to a church of which he was a member. As the old font, which was situated at the door, was in a pretty good state of preservation, it was decided to erect the new gift at the other end of the church. One Sunday morning, after the new font had been put up in the allotted place, the clergyman from the pulpit thanked the generous benefactor for his kindness in making such a handsome gift, and ended by making the following startling announcement: "In future, children will be baptized at both ends."

STOKES, the million-. aire naval architect, of New York, has set his new tub boat Ultima floating in the U. S. Experimental Model Basin, and declares that we shall go to war hereafter in a brand new type of vessel.

Ultima is a natty little ship-a tub she has been called-bristling with pluck and guns, and though she does look as though she might turn round and round. in a circle in a gale she could give effective whacks at the enemy while spinning. She has a displacement at normal load of 30,000 tons, and her indicated

MR. ANSON PHELPS STOKES. Designer of the remarkable model, the Ultima.

10,000.

With bunkers full, that is carrying 5,000 tons of coal, this doughty fighter could steam 4,200 sea miles in 23 days. One thousand five hundred tons additional can be stored for a long voyage,' giving her a coal capacity of 6,500 tons, which would enable her to bob over the waves for 5,000 miles before being obliged to run into port to "coal."

She is not built for speed, nor really for long travel, this little warlike tub Ultima, but she has fighting qualities which will make her excellent for coast defense.

As

her designer says, "although she may not be able to show a clean pair of heels to a speeder she has guns enough, and so arranged, to make all the fighters on the sea turn tail."

The main battery consists of two 15inch breech-loading guns of 60 caliber and sixteen 12-inch breech-loading guns of 50 caliber. These 12-inch guns are heavier, longer- and more powerful than any 12-inch guns now in use.

There are also twenty 3-inch guns on the upper deck, two on top of the chart room and two on top of the conning tower, and a number of machine guns and smaller guns.

The two 15-inch guns are elevated by shifting the center of gravity of the whole vessel, and their azimuths are regulated by revolving the vessel. They have a very flat trajectory, and would not have to be elevated more than 3° beyond their initial elevation of say 3°, except when operating at very great range, as in attacks on some fortified places. These 15-inch guns can be made much longer and heavier in chambers. and chases than if they were mounted on trunnions, for very large and long guns when on trunnions are found to droop at muzzle. They could destroy existing battleships before the latter could

get near enough to use their own 12-inch guns. The 12-inch guns on the Ultima are not only very much more powerful than any guns on any existing battleship, but she has many more than any fighter in our navy. Of the Ultima's sixteen 12-inch guns, ten can be trained directly forward or on either broadside. at the same time. The Connecticut, which is our doughtiest man o'war, has only two 12-inch guns that can be trained directly forward at the same time. Even if the 15-inch guns were omitted and if no other guns were to take their place on gun deck, the Ultima would be more than four times as powerful as any existing battleship.

The two counterpoises, 400 tons each, have together sufficient weight, when moved from right forward to right aft, to elevate these guns 3° above their initial elevation of 3°, making 6° in, all. For further elevation, water ballast can be used.

The sides of the Ultima present a small effective target, being about one-half the length of the latest battleships. This shortness and the obliquity of the inner shafts, the distance apart of the outer shafts and the additional rudder make the Ultima one of the most easily managed gunboats designed. The rudders contain 350 square feet each.

Four torpedo tubes are placed on the lower deck and there are facilities for placing additional tubes aft on the mezzanine deck.

The Ultima is encased in heavy armor where such protection is absolutely necessary, but the amount needed for pro

number of little boats, including lifeboats.

The Ultima would be a very steady gun platform, as it would occupy a large part of the wave slope or slopes, and have always a very flat effective wave slope. She has great metacentric weight, and large fresh water tanks and water ballast tanks. Some of these when partly filled, could be arranged as "water chambers," to have an "extinctive effect" tending to counteract the wave motion. The counterpoises could also be used for this purpose.

United States naval experts have expressed themselves very well pleased with this new fighter and when we go to war again it may be in just such a tub as the Ultima design.

Car Moved by Weight MANY of the streets in the city of

Seattle are so hilly that a street car cannot ascend them by means of the ordinary electric trolley, so the electric current is assisted by what is called a counter weight. When a car is ready to go up one of the hills a cable is attached to it which reaches to the top, then passes around a large pulley or wheel sunk beneath the street level. The other end of the cable is fastened to a huge iron casting which slides along in a sort of subway specially constructed for it beneath the pavement. The weight of the car is nearly balanced by this counter weight so that the electric current is only needed to give it sufficient motion to overcome the additional load represented by

STREET CAR BEING DRAWN UP STEEP HILL BY WEIGHT.

the passengers in the car. The electric motors not only start the car but start the cable mechanism so that when the car ascends the weight descends. The next car which goes down the hill is attached to the cable and is prevented from going too rapidly by the counter weight, which is of course pulled back to the top by the movement of the car. This picture shows one of the shorter lines of railroad in Seattle which are operated in this novel

manner.

Good Roads in India INDIA possesses many fine highways, though this fact is not generally known. One of the best, which runs from Bombay to Delhi, is 900 miles in length. One of even greater length is that on the Afghanistan frontier, from Peshawur to Calcutta. These roads were built before the days of the railroad to serve as military highways. The native. princes take pride in keeping them in repair. The automobilist in India is constantly surprised and delighted by the ease with which he may travel from one place to another.