Agassiz drops from his summit, for he virtually (sic) affirms that the germ of humanity is an egg" (S. & H., 542). "One distinguished anatomist argues that mortals sprung from eggs" (S. & H., 543).

Mrs. Eddy's science denies that mortals, or any animal, springs from eggs, as follows:

"The propagation of their species by butterfly, bee and moth, without the customary presence of male companions, is a discovery corroborative of the science of mind" (S. & H., 541).

"The late Louis Agassiz, by his microscopical examination of a vulture's ovum, strengthens the author's view of the scientific theory of creation. He was able to see, in the egg, the earth's atmosphere, the gathering clouds, the moon, and stars, and a small sun" (S. & H., 539).

Such stuff as this is hardly worthy to be called nonsense; it is merely idiotic mumbling.

"Science and Health" claims to be:

"A revelation from God" (S. & H., 1).

"The child called Wonderful" (3) (see Isaiah-" Counsellor, the mighty God, the everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace") (Miscellaneous Writings of Mrs. Eddy, 321).

"The guiding orb of truth, the daystar" (preface, S. & H.). "The Star of Bethlehem" (M. W., 320).

"The little book which was brought down from heaven by the mighty angel" (M. W., 550-see Rev., chap. x.).

"God's right hand, grasping the universe" (M. W., 364). We are loth to sully our pages with this blasphemy. So far from extending any "courtesy to Christian Science, on religious grounds, we pronounce it to be a deliberate fraud, concocted to gull credulous people out of money.

1. It is a fraudulent appropriation of the writings and views of one Dr. Guimby.*

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2. Although Mrs. Eddy says that when she wrote it, she was only a scribe, transcribing what God indited" (sic) (M.W.S., 11), she claims to be its "author," and as such had the audacity to copyright it in 1870.

3. She kept it from publication during six years in order

*See "A Complete Exposure of Christian Science or Eddyism, and the Plain Truth Regarding Mary Baker G. Eddy." By Frederick W. Peabody, member of Boston Bar, 1901.

to find out whether it could be "profitably published ". (preface to S. & H.).

4. She declares it to be "the Holy Ghost" (S. & H., 579), and sells it at a profit of $2.50 for the cheapest edition. (See Acts viii. 20: "Thy money perish with thee, because thou hast thought that the gift of God can be purchased with money.")

5. "Science and Health" has been, from time to time, altered, sections being dropped, or transposed; and as selections from it are read every Sunday, responsively, purchase of new editions is required.

6. In order to prevent any one from poaching on her preserves, she issued an ordinance, expressly "forbidding the teaching of Christian Science for money" (M.W., 315), and notwithstanding boasts that she had 4,000 students in seven years, from each of whom she received $300, for twelve lectures, at first, and for seven lectures afterwards, she herself being the only teacher. Concerning this fee, she says, she was led to name $300"; "the amount greatly troubled me; I shrank from asking it, but was finally led, by a strange providence, to accept this fee. God has since shown me the wisdom of this decision." (4,000 at $300 $1,200,000).

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7. To enhance the sale of her book, she not only publishes testimonials, which occupy seventy pages of M. W., but has the audacity to publish a testimonial from God, as follows: "The perusal of the author's publications heals sickness constantly" (S. & H., 443).

8. She claims that looking merely at another of her books, viz., "Christ and Christmas," has cured sickness-"A mother writes: Looking at the pictures in your book healed my child"" (M. W., 372).

9. Besides these books, the faithful have to purchase hymns, weeklies, quarterlies, journals, music, poetry, portraits of Mrs. E., etc., etc., all issued by the Christian Science publishing establishments.

10. To further increase her emoluments, Mrs. Eddy hit upon the device of "souvenir spoons," about dessert size, adorned with a representation of Mrs. Eddy, portrait and house; price, $3.00 silver, $5.00 gold plated. In Christian Science journal, Mrs. Eddy enjoined every one of her followers to buy a spoon

*See Peabody.

for each member of his family. Looking at this spoon is certified, in Christian Science Sentinel, to have restored sight to a lady.

11. Over fifty institutions exist on this continent which teach Christian Science, transmuting leather cutters, masons, caretakers, anybody, in fact, into Christian Science healers-if they can scare up $100.

12. Lastly. Success in Christian Science healing depends upon money-no pay, no cure. In Christian Science journal a healer writes: "When I first began the healing work I rebelled against charging for it. One day I was called to see a patient. As I disliked to charge for my work, I was so much distressed that the patient received no benefit from the treatment. Then it came to me that we had been told to charge for our services. That settled it, and the patient was better at once."

We take leave of Christian Science with disgust. Mr. Farlow must look elsewhere for any sympathy for such an egregious imposture.

J. H. R.

"BEING DONE GOOD."

NEVER look a gift horse in the mouth, be the gift from saint or sinner, is a good rule to follow. A friend must have thought his physician needed a laugh, and so he gave him a book in which the author, a rheumatic, laughs at himself and at the many cures " he takes. Beginning with the allopathic physician's treatment, he tries the various sanatoria, homeopaths, electricians, "specialists," right down to the Christian Scientists. It is an odd sensation to laugh at one's self, at one's methods, and then at one's neighbor and his methods, and we feel it would be positively selfish not to share the smile; so, Brother Chip," here's looking at you":

"Of all the ill winds that blow good to the doctors and the druggists, rheumatism is the greatest. It is in respect of that familiar metaphor a perennial cyclone. It is the most reliable old pot boiler that doctors have, and if anybody should really find a cure for it, the doctors would be scared to death."

"To be done, good, by the cautery, the victim bares his back and the doctor proceeds to swipe. The odor of burning flesh quickly fills the room. The most rheumatic victim becomes spry. He does the czardas, the hoochee-koochee, the can-can, and the

Highland fling, and accompanies himself with song. The doctor is surprised, and says the young women come to him especially for this form of nerve tonic. In your mind's eye you see whole trainloads from young ladies' seminaries coming to town to sample Paquelin's popular pacifiers."

"An Italian came along. He had evidently worked around new buildings, and had been in the habit of drinking directly from the hose used by the man who mixes the mortar. The author had engaged the representative of the Tree Planting Society to remove the vegetarian caterpillars from the tree directly in front of the house. The apparatus used for this purpose consists of a pump; a barrel of bug poison, mounted on a waggon, and a long hose leading from the barrel. The Italian arrived just as work on the The faucet end of the hose was shut off and lay on the sidewalk. All hosiery looked alike to this fellow. He reached for it and turned the tap.

caterpillars was to begin.

'For God's sake, Johnny, don't drink that!" shouted the caterpillar man from the waggon, with one hand on his heart.

"The Italian cursed him for his stinginess, but passed on, alive. Which goes to show that a man will put anything down his throat. He begins on pins and buttons when a baby and never lets up."

"In the author's case, however, nothing that the allopath had in stock seemed strong enough to budge the enemy. A hundred efforts were made to reach his base of supplies, but it was no use. Every resource of the allopath was tried-arsenic, strychnine, salol, protonuclein, ammonial, iodide of potassium (on a mercurial poisoning theory which didn't pan out) and the pharmacopeia knows what all-everything which had ever killed or cured a human being or been avoided by a dog, has been introduced to and into this case. It became so that this expert could tell in a few minutes, by sniffing around in a drug store, whether the proprietor was out of any particular drug, or just how much he had left. This applied to goods in stoppered bottles and included the full line, except soap, cologne, candy, hair-brushes and hot-water bags, though when in these departments the scent sometimes wandered and chased the quarry in among the red flannel chest protectors and the liver pads."

Speaking of Turkish baths he says: "The first thing you do at a Turkish bath is to pay a dollar. Then you write your name and address in a large book. This proves valuable in case you are

not able to remove the remains unaided. Your jewelry and valuables you leave in the safe, because some Turk not yet sobered up may go home in your clothes. One side of the establishment is for men and the other for women. Should Dr. Mary Walker enter, she would leave her duds on the men's side and escape to the women's room through a private door. The sight of her clothes. on the women's side would create needless alarm, and might ruin the business.

"This is no society function, hence bathing suits are not needed."

"Emerging in your natural beauty, or pristine elegance, you approach the platform scale and are weighed in. Allow one-quarter pound tare for the towel and your net weight may be easily computed. You then step from the scale to the hot room.

A number of other Adams are in the hot room, some well done and some rare. The stout men show the best results. It is not a case of grilled bones with them, as it proves to be with the rest of us. A two-hundred pounder hardly bakes at all. He stews in his own gravy, while a lean man, shut in for the same term, must drink a gallon of water in order to raise even a dew."

You must drink plenty of water when in the hot room. They tell you that ice water is the thing to take. You see, the idea is to convert you into a percolator and thus wash you from the inside out. The heat sets all the bodily machinery at work. A glass of water goes in, and in three minutes, provided the pumps work, beads forth on the surface."

"Thus you sit and percolate during the first ten minutes. Your steady drip on the marble floor, if heard in the night at home, would rout you out of bed to light the lantern and make a search for leaking pipes."

Speaking of the dilution of drugs by homeopathic physicians, the author continues: "The homeopath makes no claim that the human body can be nourished by food suggestions. At present he claims to remove disease only by the drop whose potency cannot be lost, no matter how large the quantity of liquid in which it is diluted. If a stone be thrown in the Atlantic at Coney Island, it sets up a ripple which washes the western shore of Africa. Homeopaths, bathing abroad, would find these ripples large enough to dive through. Other folks would not notice them. The rag man's bells set up vibrations which go space for all time, for nothing is lost in nature. the sound waves as are not converted into heat,

So with sound. ringing through Such portions of by impact with