Page images
PDF
EPUB
[blocks in formation]

desire of peace. . The powers at war all profess to contend for order and an established religion, yet I have never heard that they have at any time publicly in the churches put up a prayer, or set apart a day for humiliation and fasting, for a restoration of tranquility. It is not to be supposed but that from the particular attention I have paid, in my perusal of the rescripts and manifestos of the parties at war, and which employment, I own, has expedited my recovery in some degree, so far as to be able to walk abroad again, and, like the Swiss, shew myself ready for the service of the poorest as well as the richest exchequer, I must have discovered the true cause of, and which was the aggressor in, this already too long protracted warfare.

Her Holiness, the elect Queen of the Non-descripts, having subsidized a considerable number of troops, already arrived and come to action, from the territories of the Princes CLAMOR, RIXA, Joci, MENDACIA, FURTA, CACHINNI, contrary to all the laws of all nations in dialectical wars, against the descendant of Cadwalladar, who has been basely deserted by all the neighbouring Princes, excepting Ap Gwyr, and Ap Styffnig; recollecting the good understanding and friendship subsisting between the houses of these renowned Princes and the Chief of the most ancient house of the Mac Sarcasms, I have determined, without further manifesto, to join, with my whole force, to bring on a general action with her HOLINESS, to

PREFACE.

ακροις, ταρςοις,

fight, not " ," but gladiis comminus, i. e. in plain English, not " on our tiptoes," but foot to foot, sword to sword, hand to hand, with fixed bayonets, and so put an end to the further effusion of atramentuous blood, for which worthy action I hope to receive the thanks of all friends to order, subordination, regular government, hierarchy in the church, and royalty in the state; for having perused the archives of my dynasty, for above five thousand years back, I have discovered my family has been invariably attached to these principles, and that, from the beginning, government has almost always consisted of KING and PRIEST.

Dropping, however, all metaphor and allusion, I thought it reasonable and expedient to enquire into the real merit of the parties at difference; and considering that as the name of H. More has made some noise in this country, to read her works attentively, and according to the just rules of criticism endeavour to appreciate her talents and genius as a literary person, and her true, genuine, mental character as a woman. This, I myself am of opinion, I have done; and in this small volume compressed more than all the learning contained in Mrs. More's works, consisting of eight, and, therefore, have saved the reader much labour and expence in winnowing a little wheat from much chaff.

Ample specimens of her Poetry and Prose are presented to the reader, the most creditable to the author I could find; her doctrines, principles and

vi

[ocr errors]

PREFACE.

practices, as far as they could be collected from her own'works, and her controversies with others, are pointed out, examined, and approved or condemned. "Where much is given, and arrogated, much is required." Let not my reader be prejudiced; if he will read, he will meet with the beauties as well as the deformities of the fair one: and if the judicious und discriminating reader shall be disappointed in the opinion he had formed of the lady's excellencies, and "high-toned morality," or the justice and judiciousness of the criticism, let him remember it is not the first time he has been deceived in his expectation of the excellence and the judgment of mankind. It will certainly serve to make Mrs. More better known than she has hitherto been, and to demonstrate the practicability of factitious, for a number of years, usurping the seat of genuine excellence; and to ascertain whether she has or has not been, according to the waggish Peter," a bit of an impostor."

The principal actions of her life, viz. her secret. calumnies of Mrs. Yearsley, her quarrel with her and Mrs. Cowley, and her literary larceny from each; together with a brief narrative of the grand transaction of her history-the Blagdon holy war-are noticed. The words Blagdon war occur oftener than I could wish; but as the event of that struggle against a powerful faction affects the interest of not only all the regular Clergy of the empire, but also of the people at large, it is hoped this inevitable circumstance will be excused.

[blocks in formation]

As to myself, I confess I am disappointed with respect to the motive, object, and mode of prosecuting the war. The Curate has certainly made out his case, as admitted by herself and her advocate, who has thrown up his brief. He has fully proved, by a variety of evidence, the extravagancies of her Teacher, which were countenanced by herself; and the pleasure she seemed to enjoy from the impious adulation of her disciples, in the effusion of their extemporaneous prayers.-On the other hand, her transmitting "secret accusations" of the most serious nature to the Bishop is proved by Dr. Crossman's letter, the Bishop's mandate, notice to quit, Drewitt, her disciple, his personal attendance to take possession and to do duty as licensed Curate of Blagdon, is proved by all the evidence the human mind is capable of considering, and which nothing less than the utmost depravity will ever contradict. Of all this she stands convicted, yet continues contumaciously mute, ashamed to put in any defence; but privately directs anonymous publications!

As the doctrine of the Trinity, and the Athanasian creed are known to have been two of the articles of accusation, I was in hopes the public would have been much edified by the Polemics mutually bringing forward, in a new dress, all the old arguments, pro and con, with some new matter; and that they would have proved their thesis mathematically, as well as by scripture: but these topics, to the great

[blocks in formation]

disappointment and loss of the learned, have not yet undergone the least discussion.

[ocr errors]

I had almost forgot, and I think it material to observe, that it is not decorous, advantageous, nor creditable for the established church to be without a Knight in the number of her defenders, whilst her HOLINESS, the Non-descript Queen, has a very respectable Baronet as her advocate and counsellor, a man well skilled in the sophistry of dispute, and decomposition" of evidence and argument. It is for this reason I thought it incumbent on me to bring my troops into action, with the hopes of speedily effecting a restoration of peace: but, if this object, so desirable to the whole country, and especially to the contending parties, should, unhappily, not be accomplished, and war shall still continue, to add to the curses entailed on man, I have to request, that the Ministers and Secretaries of State to her HOLINESS, who may have occasion to introduce my name, will have the goodness to write it at full length, thus-SIR ARCHIBALD MAC SARCASM, and not SIR A. lest on account of a sort of prosthetical alliteration my name should be confounded with that of my brother SIR ABRAHAM ELTON, Bart.

ARCHIBALD MAC SARCASM.

« PreviousContinue »