of Missionaries who are now pursuing their labor of love amid the Western wilds, and in far countries. I love to think of temples raised in the wilderness, and hearts consecrated to the service of the living God in the midst of the heathen; and I can sympathize with those who are stretched on a bed of languishing. How sweet it is for them, and for me, to feel that the word is nigh us, even in our hearts. Oh, I feel that 'this peaceful calm within my breast' is, indeed, 'the sure pledge of heavenly rest.' May I be more fervent in prayer during the remainder of this day." "14th.-I believe that my Heavenly Father is drawing me nearer to Himself by the sweet influence of the Holy Spirit. I long to be more closely united to Christ. Yesterday was a happy day: I had much solitude: and solitude is to me an invaluable thing. I spent the early part of the morning in prayer and self-examination, the remainder in reading the Bible, and then retired to bed in acute bodily suffering, but with a trust that God will bless it to my soul, and, I hope, to the spiritual welfare of others. I had a hot fever; felt very far from well, and reflected that the remainder of my sojourn here will probably be passed in aggravated bodily suffering. To the flesh this is rather a dark picture, but the light of faith illumines it. My Heavenly Father has supported me; he has even made me feel that mine are 'light afflictions,' and I believe that, through His infinite mercy, they will work for me a 'far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.' I am willing to suffer the will of the Lord, and even thankful. I have felt to-day, as I should suppose a person in the last stage of consumption would feel, such exceeding weakness, and pain in my breast; but I have been supported. Oh, then, let me not doubt. "I had a very pleasant ride this afternoon. I felt interested for the souls of the multitudes I saw in the streets. The country looked very sweet: how much more beautiful will be the better country! Oh, that I may be safely landed there ere long, if it be my Heavenly Father's will." "15th.Another day of bodily suffering and peace of mind has passed. Oh, that I could praise my Heavenly Father as I ought for his exceeding mercies. Spiritual blessings seem to me more than ever desirable. "If I can judge from feelings, I shall not live very long. I suffer more and more. "16th. "Tis my happiness below, Not to live without the cross; Let me retire with a grateful heart for the continued mercies of this day, both temporal and spiritual. I enjoyed my twilight hour of devotion more than usual, and during the evening had sweet relief from prayer. I have not, as I once had, a continual weight at my heart. I know now where to go with my perplexities and sufferings. How ardently I desire a nearer approach to my Saviour! It is, I feel, only in a near union with Him that safety consists. finished to-day, Henry Martyn's Life: I prayed earnestly that I might derive instruction from it, and trust that I have." I "18th. This is our lecture night, and I determined to spend it in my room, and hold communion in secret, but I have been weighed down, by pain, and have really been scarcely able to think connectedly, but I can thank my Heavenly Father for my afflictions, for I know that He will sanctify them. I think my faith is strengthened. I can never be satisfied till I know more of Jesus; until my love for Him is entire; my trust unshaken. 'Love divine, how sweet thou art!'"' CHAPTER VI. 1834. Convictions of Duty-Letter of Encouragement-Assurance - Enjoyment of Christian Biography-Love for Society of Christians-Delight in the Law of God-Interest in the Church-Letter to an Enquirer-Dr. Bedell's Death-Funeral Sermon-Religious Souvenir. COULD eleven weeks of imprisonment and suffering have been more profitably spent! How was the Saviour's promise fulfilled to this his meek, languishing, waiting disciple: "If a man love me he will keep my words, and my Father will love him, and we will come unto him and make our abode with him." These pantings after holiness and God, these sweet refreshing glimpses of the Saviour and his kingdom, this discovery of the treasures of knowledge, wisdom and love, hid in the divine word, are undeniable proofs of the presence and the instruction of the Holy Ghost the Comforter. And when we trace such a record of the inner life of a young and admired female, whose twenty-first year is not yet completed, have we not cause to exclaim, "Who teacheth like Him?" We cannot forbear to notice, in this heart-chronicle, the allusion to the deep impression of the writer that there was a work for her to do, and that this commission specially was to urge upon her fellow-creatures "immediate attention to their souls' best interests." "Something tells me that there is work for me to do; that I must warn those around me with faithfulness of their danger, and urge them to flee to Jesus for safety." How well and faithfully this work was done, there are many witnesses. And how effectually this work can be done by woman, without stepping beyond her own sphere, even by the enfeebled and secluded invalid, will be evident to every attentive reader of this biography. When we compare, with her subsequent course, this transcript of her early and deep convictions as to the duty of direct personal effort for the salvation of others, we may recognize with devout gratitude the agency of the Spirit, preparing her for future and extended usefulness. Designs of mercy for many souls besides her own were connected with this allotment of suffering. God was preparing a fit messenger to invite the impoverished and the thirsting to the living waters. The Saviour was fitting a polished shaft to his bow of strength. And while purifying the soul of his handmaiden, as gold is purified seven times in the fire, he impressed upon her inmost heart the nature of the work which he had for her to do. It was no vague, enthusiastic impression; no mystical, unaccountable fancy. But it was the clear, calm conviction of an understanding and conscience enlightened by the word and Spirit of God: the overflowing sympathy of a heart constrained by the love of Christ, and responding to the Master's charge, "Freely ye have received, freely give." She was not disobedient to what she interpreted to be a 'heavenly voice;' and to recommend the Lord Jesus and his salvation to the unconverted, became a fixed principle of her life. And for the different stages to which the pilgrim towards the heavenly Zion had attained, for the varied difficulties, temptations and trials of the way, she had ever ready the appropriate and seasonable counsel, drawing constantly on her own experience, and on the treasures of the word of God. * Letter to a Friend. "April 13, 1834. "This has been to me a most delightful day. I have spent nearly all of it in the solitude of my chamber, and I felt that my feelings could harmonize with the tranquillity and peace that surrounded me. The air was very balmy, the birds singing in the trees, the grass green, and I could almost have fancied myself in the country. I felt something of the Sabbath of the soul. Among other causes of gratitude that warmed my heart, the contemplation of my Heavenly Father's goodness towards thee, dear E., has not been forgotten. The reception of thy letter was much desired, and its perusal gave me great satisfaction. This may seem cruel, but can I otherwise than rejoice when I witness evidences of 'godly sorrow,' that will, I trust, work 'repentance not to be repented of?' Rejoice, dear E., in the loving-kindness of our Heavenly Father; thank Him that He has made thee feel the plague of thy own heart; remember that He wounds to heal. The bruised reed will He not break, the smoking flax will He not quench.' He has said, 'Come unto me, all ye that are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest;' and 'Whosoever cometh to me I will in no wise cast out.' Do not fear to trust Him who was crucified for thee, and who is 'faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.' The twilight hour has come, and I will now pray for thee, that thee may have grace to help in time of need. "Tuesday eve. I shall not feel quite comfortable until I have dispatched this letter, for although I feel my inability to minister to a mind diseased,' yet with my Heavenly Father's aid I would direct thy attention to the Balm of Gilead, 'a sovereign balm for every wound, a cordial for our fears.' Thee says, dear E., that thee feels 'a deep sense of thy sinfulness in the sight of a pure and holy God, and thy need of the redeeming blood of Jesus.' With these feelings, thee is as worthy a suppliant as has ever since the creation sought and found redemption. Thee 'prays for faith.' Thank heaven, this is a prayer which, if offered with sincerity and humility, never has been and never will be rejected to all eternity. "And now let me offer a few words of advice, which, if thee will be persuaded to take, will save thee from much danger and needless suffering. Do not stop, dear E., to analyse thy feelings. Do not wait to consider how deep a sense of sinfulness thee has attained, how far thee is indifferent to things of a worldly nature, and whether a spiritual taste has been excited in thy heart, but go to Jesus just as thou art. Remember that He sees and pities thy infirmities, and is more willing to extend relief than thou to ask it. If thee cannot believe, let thy prayer be, 'Help thou mine unbelief,' and I have the authority of my Maker to promise thee that thy prayer will be answered. Oh, be very fervent in prayer, and if thy prayers are cold, do not be discouraged - do not sin against God by doubting His mercy. "I would recommend to thy attention the fifty-fifth chapter of Isaiah. We have, indeed, 'exceeding great and precious promises.' |