HOW TO BE HAPPY.

BY A. B. JOHNSON.

THE learned are continually witnessing the explanation of so many mysteries, and the development of so many wonders, that they know not what to disbelieve; while the unlearned are so frequently compelled to believe what they cannot explain, and to witness performances which they have deemed impossible, that they believe almost any thing. These are the classes of society who became ready victims some few years since to the moon hoax of Locke,' and who crowd the lecture-rooms of animal-magnetizers to ascertain whether men can really be made to see without the agency of eyes; and who submit their heads to the examination of phrenology, for the purpose of learning the extent of their own sagacity. But between these extremes of knowledge and ignorance, are found a vast multitude of people, who err on the side of incredulity, and sturdily reject every assumption that conflicts with their personal experience. They seem to have no poetry in their organization, and life is to them nothing but a routine of common-place occurrences. They are the men who in the days of Captain Lemuel Gulliver, the great early discover of unknown countries, disbelieved his narratives, though we are now enabled by a most fortunate accident to render tardy justice to that much abused navigator; so far at least as relates to the country of the Houynhnms, and the intellectual intelligence of its quadruped inhabitants. Some twenty-three years ago, a Nantucket whaler fell in with the coast of those people, and the captain saw on the beach what he supposed to be a mare with two very young colts. He naturally inferred that the country was inhabited, and hoping he might procure from the inhabitants some fresh provisions of which he was much in need, by reason that some of his men exhibited symptoms of scurvy; he ordered a boat to be lowered from the ship, and proceeded with it to the beach. The moment he landed and approached within a short distance of the mare, he became satisfied that he was in the country of the Houynhnms; for the mare, instead of fearing the approach of the stranger, trotted up to him in the most aristocratic manner, with the unmistakeable intention of seizing him, and probably transporting him into the interior, where he would have been held in bondage to horses for the remainder of his life. Who can blame him when under such circumstances he drew from his belt a large double-shotted pistol, and killed the assailant, amiable and respected though she may have been among her own people. The colts were too young to understand the irreparable loss which they had sustained, and quietly permitted the captain and his boat's crew to take them on shipboard, whence they were eventually carried to Nantucket and sold to a farmer of the interior, who treated them kindly though he was ignorant of their real character. They soon themselves, lost all distinct recollection of their

origin, though an observer who knew the stock from which they sprang, could easily have discovered that they were not common horses; but evidently communed together in language intelligible to themselves.

The colts were unbroken and lived in a fine fresh clover pasture which yielded them an abundance of juicy food; though they kept cropping it night and day as if they were trying for a wager whether they could not eat faster than nature could replenish. One calm summer morning, the sun was just peering above the horizon, the birds of the neighborhood were just commencing the labor of hunting for breakfast, and the spiders on the fences and grass were repairing their webs, which had been injured by the dews of the past night; and all were working with the activity that results from pleasant anticipations that the dawning day was to be prodigal of vivacity and sport. The colts also, had just arisen from their grassy beds, and were shaking the dust from their smooth sides preparatory to the commencement of any frolic that should occur, when suddenly a small dog bounded over the fence into the pasture, and ran furiously toward the colts with open mouth and shrill bark, as though he intended nothing less than to eat them both up when he should arrive near enough, or at least inflict on them some grievous bodily injury. The colts, in all the hilarity of untamed youth and high spirits, pointed at him their long flexible ears, as though they were much alarmed, and wanted to be fully acquainted with the whole extent of their danger. They permitted him to approach sufficiently near to make him yelp fearfully in repentance of his temerity, when they snorted loud, turned short about, threw their heels at him high into the air; and then relieved the little braggart's fears by bounding forward across the field like a shadow.

But the dog portended something more than the colts imagined. He was but the precursor of his and their master, who soon appeared in person, and authoritatively calling back the dog, chid him for his currish interference with what he was not bidden to intermeddle with. The colts stood still to admire this new incident, and to enjoy the fun of seeing their petty assailant sneak slowly toward his master, with half bended knees and imploring eyes as though some invisible spell which he could not resist, was dragging him reluctantly forward to expected punishment. The moment of triumph is often the moment of danger; and the colts, who now felt that they had been abundantly revenged, and might seek some new sport, soon found that the man had also a mission for them, and that he was not to be baffled as the dog had been. They had hitherto known men only as admirers, and who in that character tolerate all manner of antic tricks; but now they were required to know man as a master; a change which alters his conduct considerably, as young ladies often discover as well as colts. In vain they dodged in every direction as the owner approached; they were eventually driven into a short corner, where escape became impracticable, and both were finally bitted and bridled.

When the colts looked at each other, and saw the curious head-dress with which they were ornamented, each neighed with mirth at the grotesque appearance of the other; but when the owner intimated, by gently pulling at the bridles, that he wished the colts to follow him, they

began to think the sport had proceeded far enough; and that the time was come for them to assert their disinclination to proceed with it any further. This attempt at resistance in the commencement of their bridle career, reminded the master rather facetiously of something that he had once experienced in another capacity, when he commenced house-keeping in days long passed; and being prepared for the contingency, he drew from under his coat a switch which he had heretofore politicly kept concealed, and gently applied it to the flanks of the horse that seemed the most unruly.

When Black and Grey thus found that resistance was productive of only pain, they gradually acquiesced in the wishes of their master, and permitted him to lead them out of the pasture, and down a long lane into a large building that was used as a bark-mill; and in which grinding was performed daily by horses. A long pole ran through the centre of an upright shaft, and a horse was to be harnessed to each end of the pole. The horses walk in a circle and thus keep the shaft turning; and the shaft moves wheels that grind the bark.

The colts felt as boys feel when they first enter a school-room; and like them, viewed with a wondering stare the various new objects with which they were surrounded, and of whose use and intent they had not the remotest conception. They admired in particular the collars and other harness, that dangled from the ends of the pole, and with which Ned the owner's foreman, was busily investing their necks and bodies. He finally completed the equipment of Grey by placing over his eyes a pair of leather blinders which create no pain, but while they are on a horse he is prevented from seeing. Ned attempted next to place a similar pair over the eyes of Black, who felt no inclination for the accoutrement, and evidently began to think as many philosophers have thought before him, that if one will not resist encroachments on his liberty, he will soon have no liberty left to be encroached on. But Ned was not the man to be controlled by a colt, so he raised his whip, and after inflicting a few switches, Black concluded to submit; while Ned exclaimed, 'You fool, can you not as well submit before a whipping as after?' Ned seemed to think the colt ought to know this alternative intuitively, forgetting that he had learned it himself by only sad and repeated experience.

All the preparations being completed, and the colts harnessed securely to the pole; Ned gave an intimation of his wishes, and forward plunged and pranced the colts. He knew that the harnesss was sufficiently strong, so he permitted them to bound onward in any way they should prefer, as PROVIDENCE permits man, knowing that by the organization of the machinery, they must work out the design of the mill. In a little time however, they were fain to remit their caprioles and caracoles, their animal spirits being much exhausted, and they began to be disciplined by affliction, and to walk forward as decently as their predecessors had walked. Exceedingly home-sick were they both notwithstanding; but Grey being a wise little horse and somewhat of a philosopher, gradually resolved that as he could not make his condition conform to his feelings, he would try and make his feelings conform to his condition. His eyes being covered he could not see; but as the

ground over which he was walking seemed soft and cool, he thought he must be rambling over some fields as beautiful probably as his own pasture. He heard curious noises around him, but as they proved to be harmless, he began to find them amusing, and to imagine that they must be the music of birds of a larger species than those of his own clover fields; and possibly of a more beautiful plumage, since they were of larger dimensions. The smell of the tan bark was at first of fensive to him, but the good humor into which he had reasoned himself, like the effect of religious faith which makes man see future good in present evil, induced him to convert the smell into a savory odor; and as he was by this time ravenously hungry, he thought the odor must proceed from some new species of clover as gigantic probably as the birds; and much he should have liked to be cropping it. Amid these agreeable reflections he was stopped, and a pail of water was lifted to his mouth. He was never before so thirsty, and this gave to the water a relish which made it surpass in flavor all the water he had ever tasted; and fully confirmed him in the conclusion, that his new residence was a terrestrial equine paradise, where every thing was as much increased in zest, as enlarged in dimensions.

After driving around some time longer, the colts were stopped for the day. The blinders were removed from their eyes, and they were delighted to find themselves in each other's company; for they knew they had started in opposite directions, and the expectation of never meeting together again, had harrowed the feelings of Black, and greatly exasperated his ideal sufferings. The colts were also surprised at finding themselves in the same spot from which they had commenced their journey; but being too much rejoiced that the adventure was thus terminated, to care much by what means the results had been produced, they quietly permitted themselves to be unharnessed and turned loose once more into clover.

Being left alone and at liberty, their first care was to satisfy the cravings of hunger by a copious repast and then lying down near each other, they were in a favorable condition of mind and body to narrate to each other their several adventures. Black was all sorrow and complaints; he spoke mournfully of the stripes which he had received, and for no fault of his; but to gratify the malignant tryanny of that Jack in office,' Ned. He remembered having heard other colts remark, that Ned was a bad fellow; and he found that the half had not been told which ought to be known on the subject. He affirmed that after they had parted company in the morning, he was driven all day amid the most imminent perils from trees, which were continually falling and crashing around him; and from which his escape with whole bones was almost a miracle. The road too, must have been an arid sand, for the dust suffocated him; and possessed beside an intolerable and pestilential odor. But more cruel than all, was the stagnant, fetid water that had been accumulated in some hollow log, and that he was compelled to drink or die of thirst.

At these misadventures of poor Black, Grey felt almost sorry enough to cry, for he was a compassionate little horse; and much he hoped that if they should ever chance to be again the victims of Ned's experi

ments, that they both might travel amid the delightful scenes and over the pleasant ground that had fortunately been allotted to him. All he regretted was that he had been denied the privilege of inspecting with unblinded eyes the good things with which he was surrounded; but possibly, who knows? the blindness was imposed for some good purpose rather than for evil. He had once heard a sermon on such a subject. Little comfort, however, yielded these remarks to Black, who insisted that he never would submit again to the impositions of Ned or any other biped, but defend his rights as a horse ought, with all the powers that nature had given to the noblest quadruped that trod the earth. In pondering on these chivalrous resolves and abstract rights of horses, he neglected the practical duty of sleeping while he might, and kept awake the greater part of the night; while Grey, who troubled himself but little with metaphysics, slept comfortably and dreamed of the delightful odors and delicious fountains of the preceding day.

The next morning the sun rose just as bright as before, and the birds and spiders began the day as merrily and busily as they had commenced yesterday. The frogs in an adjoining marsh began tuning their matin orisons, like chanting boys in a large cathedral, when the colts arose also, and shook their sides as usual. Grey cropped his breakfast with a good appetite, but Black was not hungry, nor was he pleased to find that surrounding objects were not as gloomy as he was. For the first time in his life he thought the sun looked brazen and too garish; nor did the gayety of the inhabitants of the pasture betoken the sympathy which he felt due to his wounded feelings. 'Why! to look around us,' said Black, 'one would suppose nothing unusual had happened yesterday. I begin to find out the hollowness of the world, of which I had only heard before.' He would probably have continued his lamentations, had not Ned appeared to again summon them to the mill. Grey yielded without a struggle, and Black had to yield; but not till he had been soundly whipped for his refractory propensities. Again they were harnessed to the pole, again they wore blinders, and again moved forward in opposite directions. In the evening, when they were unharnessed and unblinded, they were again surprised at finding themselves in each other's company; and while again reclining in their pasture at night, and recounting their adventures, Grey was found to have been as much favored as before, while Black had again met with nothing but his former horrors; aggravated by the reception during the journey of several beatings for apparently no cause but the attempt to assert his rights. The same adventures recurred during several successive days; and what seemed peculiarly among the inscrutable mysteries of PROVIDENCE, and hard to bear, Black was always driven over the dreary road and Grey over the pleasant one. Grey, accordingly became plump, sleek and happy, while Black became lean, irritable and miserable; and had horses possessed lunatic asylums, Black would have been a very suitable subject for the skill of some veterinary Brigham or Perkins.

The colts were at length so far subdued and accustomed to their daily business, that Ned one morning left their eyes uncovered; and hence, to the utter astonishment of both horses, they discovered that in