himself he began; "Pills! Pills! Well, breddern and sistern, dere am pills an' pills. Dere am quinine pills an' headache pills an' physic pills, an' dere am de kind ob pills our brudder in de rear pew takes when he has been out all night; but de kind ob pill dat I am goin' to speak about dis ebening am de Gospil. THEN WILLIE SLOPED. As papa was about to apply the strap Willie said firmly: "Father, unless that instrument has been properly sterilized I desire to protest.' This made the old man pause. "Moreover," continued Willie, "the germs that might be released by the violent impact of leather upon a porous textile fabric, but lately exposed to the dust of the streets, would be apt to affect you deleteriously." The strap fell from a nerveless hand. ON THE SECOND DAY OUT. Early one morning a terribly seasick passenger, pale and hollow-eyed, came out of his stateroom and ran into a lady, who was coming along the passageway, clad in the scantiest raiment. She screamed and started to run. "Don't be alarmed,'' groaned the man. "Don't be alarmed, Madam; I shall never live to tell it.'' THUS A COOLNESS AROSE. "Did you ever have a cold," inquired the plain citizen, "that you couldn't get rid of?", "No," answered the purist. "If I had had I would have it now.' HIS REAL BEGINNING. "I understand, you began life as a newsboy," observed a friend to a "captain of industry.'' "No," replied the millionaire. "Some one has been fooling you. I began life as an infant."' WHAT HAPPENED. Willie had tried by various means to interest his father in conversation. "Can't you see I'm trying to read?" said the exasperated parent. "Now don't bother me." Willie was silent for almost a minute. Then, reflectively: "Awful accident in the Subway to day."' Father looked up with interest. in the Subway?" "What's that?" he asked. "An accident "Yes," replied Willie, edging toward the door, "a woman had her eye on a seat and a man sat on it." LIVED ON MILK A WHOLE YEAR. "I believe absolutely in this idea of an all-milk diet," said a man. "I lived on nothing but milk for a whole year, and look at me. "On nothing but milk?'' queried a physician. "At what age?'' "During the first year of my life," quietly answered the man. The attention of physicians is called to the clinics held in connection with the college work for the first half of the session of 1909-1910. These clinics are held in the amphitheaters of the college and the Cleveland City Hospital. The college has no connection with clinics held in other places. The college solicits all classes of cases for these clinics with the understanding that patients who are able to pay for hospital accommodations or for the professional attendance given will be charged for the same. The college clinics are as follows: MONDAY-Ear, Nose and Throat, Prof. Quay; Dermatology, Prof. Spencer. WEDNESDAY-Surgery, Profs. Frost and Trego. THURSDAY-Gynecology, Prof. Wood; Medicine, Prof. Adams. FRIDAY-Surgery, Genito-Urinary and Rectal Diseases, Prof. Lytle. The Department of Obstetrics will accept patients available for clinical instruction and will care for them free of charge during labor and the lying-in and for a reasonable time preceding labor. All communications regarding any of the clinics should be addressed to JOSEPH A. LYTLE, M. D., REGISTRAR, GEORGE H. QUAY, M. D., Dean. CLEVELAND, OHIO. The PRINCIPLES of DIAGNOSIS By CLARENCE BARTLETT, M. D. 245 ILLUSTRATIONS. SIX COLORED PLATES. 976 PAGES. CLOTH, $7.00 NET. HALF-MOROCCO, $8.00 NET. POSTAGE, 52 CENTS. "Dr. Bartlett's work cannot fail to become the standard text-book on diagnosis in both Americand Great Britain."-London Homeopathic Review. "Here is a chance for our friends of the old school to show their fairness by admitting it as a text-book in their own colleges, or we venture the statement that if they will examine this book as we have done they will find it the best work in the English language on the subject."-Medical Century. "If a book is to be judged by its helpfulness we predict for this a position on a shelf quite handy for ready reference, and it will retain that position for many years to come."-Medical Advance. "It makes no difference what school you belong to you need this valuable book."-Medical Gleaner. "Accurate, thoroughly scientific, and fully up-to-date. ''-Wm. Osler, M. D., Johns Hopkins University. "It seems to me thoroughly up-to-date in that seriously important department of medicine-Diagnosis."-J. P. Sutherland, M. D., Boston University School of Medicine. "Taken as a whole, the book is by far the best of its kind on the market.”’Critique. The above comments are from 'representatives of every branch of recognized medicine and every one highly endorses the book. FOR SALE AT ALL HOMEOPATHIC PHARMACIES AND BOOK STORES ALSO THE COMPANION VOLUME BY THE SAME AUTHOR "TREATMENT." TO RESPONSIBLE PEOPLE Laughlin FOUNTAIN PEN LAUGHLIN "RED GEM DETROIT MICH. U.S.A RED GEM The Ink Pencil Your Choice of Illustrations are Exact Size Every pen guaranteed full 14 Kt. Sclid Gold-cut ou right hand may be had in either our standard black opaque pattern, or Nou-breakable Transpaent, as desired, either in plain or engraved finish, as preterred. You may try this pen a week, if you do not find it as represented, a better article than you can secure for THREE TIMES THIS SPECIAL PRICE in any other make, if not entirely satisfactory in every respect return it and we will send you $1.10 for it. CUT ON LEFT is our famous and Popular RED GEM Ink Pencil, a complete leak pax? triumph, may SPECIAL OFFER. By special arrangement we are able to give choice of above pens with one year's subscription to the Reporter for $1.50. Remit to Reporter Office. MEDICAL & SURGICAL REPORTER, CLEVELAND, OHIO. When addressing our advertisers, mention the Reporter. THE ANTIKAMNIA CHEMICAL COMPANY-ST. LOUIS, U.S.A. Imperial Granum Why It Succeeds Is the title of our new and It shows how Imperial Granum This book also contains photomicrographs of Imperial Granum and cow's milk and should be in the hands of every physician. A copy will be forwarded to you on receipt of postal request. Address John Carle & Sons, 153 Water Street, New York City When addressing our advertisers, mention the Reporter. |